Why I do what I do
A skillset isn't a mindset
In this very personal post I’ll tell you what drives me to do what I do. I’ll try to answer the questions of “what” I do and “why” I do it, as best as possible.
An artist’s life isn’t easy. It’s not necessarily hard either, but it certainly isn’t easy. I’m not complainig, it’s just a fact an artist has to accept and then deal with. I started dealing with it about a year ago. I started by reading books. In the beginning I got myself books about business, illustration, writing etc. So in general about skills I wanted to learn. But the books that stood out to me most, weren’t the books about skills as much as the ones about mentality, work ethic and productivity. I didn’t realize it at first, but what I was really looking for wasn’t a skillset. It was a mindset I was after. (I’ll add a list of books under this blog post)
The "I'm not an artist" mindset
When I started out I didn’t want to be an artist, I wanted to be an illustrator, a producer of illustrations. I didn’t necessarily see myself as a creative person, maybe more of a picture-maker in a creative field. For me, an artist was the creative type of person, someone with exceptional ideas and visions that had to be captured and shared through their works of art. I love art and I admire artists, but I didn’t have many ideas and visions and I wanted to communicate whatever I did have not through works of art, but through products.
It took me a while to realize it, but a product and a work of art is exactly the same thing in this case. My picturebooks are artworks. They might not be modern art, hiding messages between the lines, expressing visions through metaphors in splatters of paint, but they are art anyway. And that makes me an artist.
So I started reading books on how to create art. And all the problems I had experienced up until then, were there in front of me, black and white in every single book.
I had no idea people had figured out answers to all my questions.
Setting goals
I’ve always needed long-term goals. Even as a child I belived it was pointless to do anything that didn’t have a result at the end of it. I played the violin for 11 years of my life and I got pretty good at it. My father had a hard time getting me to practice though. If there wasn’t a concert planned for me to play at, I couldn’t find a reason to pick up the violin. After eleven years of practicing I failed to get into the Mozarteum University in Salzburg. I stopped playing the violin after applying two years in a row. Without a goal, there was no reason left to play. I wasn’t even that sad about it, even though I had learned to love playing the violin by then.
The point is, what I do only makes sense to me, if it leads me somewhere. And after graduationg from my media design studies, the first time in my life I didn’t have any plan to follow. There was no “next concert”, “next exam”, “next hand-in” etc. So the question I had to ask wasn’t just “what’s my next goal to work towards?”, but “what’s the over-arching path I want to take?”
I still haven’t fully answered that question, but I’m getting closer.
Asking "What?"
It’s easy to know what you’re not. I know I’m not especially creative, in comparison to other artists. I know that neither I nor my life is especially interesting in comparison to other people. I’ve always hated the term “USP” – Unique selling proposition – because I just can’t figure out why my products would be any different (let alone better) to those of other artists. Sure, every work of art is different, but generally, there is such a vast amount to choose from, that unique outliers become extremely rare. If this seems depressing, welcome to the life of an artist.
Also, I’m not in it for the craft. I like illustrating, I like writing, but I don’t “love” it. I’d be lying if I said any part of the creative process is the one thing I live for. What I do love is “creating”. I’m a creator of stories. There’s just a thrill and enjoyment in creating something, that wasn’t there before. It might not be thrilling to write or to illustrate, but there’s nothing more thrilling than seeing the final product, the work of art that could not exist, if it wasn’t for the work I put into it. It’s like yanking your imagination out of your brain and turning it into a real, physical object. It’s a slow process, but an incredible feeling at the end.
Asking "Why?"
So that’s “what” I like doing. Took me long enough to figure that one out too. Finding out “how” to do it is easy: Learn the skillsets you need. There are books on everything and the internet is a collective brain. Get the tools and learn and practice the skills.
What was really hard to figure out for me, was “Why?” I should do something. What’s the reason or purpose. Finding goals is one thing, finding purpose is another, totally different deal. Purpose is what was lacking for me, when I needed a goal to do something. There just was no purpose in doing it, I had to invent one by setting a goal. I now know what I love doing, it’s “creating”. But would I say my purpose in life is creating art? Would I create stuff just for the sake of it? No, I don’t think so. I think it’s more personal than that.
I’m not a big people’s person. I’m an introvert and like my peace and quiet. Don’t get me wrong, I like people and I enjoy being around people, it’s just that I’m very happy to get away from them as well. I like sharing insights, I don’t like sharing information. If it’s not about something important I don’t like answering questions.
Since I’m not a people’s person, I know that I’m not having a huge impact on many people’s lives. I’d like to though! And I really want to do something meaningful for as many people as I possibly can. I like sharing thoughts and dreams and like making people think and dream for themselves. And since I’m me, I know I won’t get to do that in person. So, I’ll do it with my books.
I create a story, bring something into this world that has never existed before and hope that it offers a meaningful experience to its readers.
So, that’s the whole story, that’s what I’ve figured out up until now. Answering these basic questions clears the mind, but I still have to figure out what all of this results in. What do I want, were do I go. That’s a topic for another time.
Top books I recommend for artists:
This is a list of books I have read and recommend. These are not affiliate links, not trying to make money here. They all are concered with mindsets and work ethic. Not all of them are specifically about “the artist”, but the content is applicable to the creative field as well. The list is in no particular order:
“Start with Why: How Great Leaders Inspire Everyone to Take Action” by Simon Sinek
“Keep Going: 10 Ways to Stay Creative in Good Times and Bad” by Austin Kleon
“Steal Like an Artist: 10 Things Nobody Told You About Being Creative” by Austin Kleon
“Show Your Work!: 10 Ways to Share Your Creativity and Get Discovered” by Austin Kleon
